The book

A lot of my friends here are into creative writing and poetry and so a friend of mine bought a composition notebook and leaves it out with the purpose of everyone writing in it.

BTW this is awesome and everyone should do it... just saying.

Anyway, when I post "from the book" it means that it's something I wrote for the book first. I'm just putting it on the blog for you all and as an archive.

In the book #1

Ideas surge through the mind in
A wave of unstoppable force
Pulsing, moving -
Pulling you to Doubt

One you've never known -
One you just met -
One as curious
As open

His eyes shone with wonder -
Radiating from the speeding
Cogs of cognition -
Bends and bounces

Round that physical sanctum
Before pushing its way
Past the veil of Ideas
Into the minds of those nearby

And He cannot contain
His excitement

Emotion

I'm a slight extrovert which means that I draw my energy from being with other people -

This is definitely true - I most certainly don't want to be alone at this moment

That being said, there is not a single person in my life I can think of - parents, new friends, old friends, sibling, mentors, god knows who else - that I can think of that I want to be around/talk to right now.

What I realized is that force myself not to fall subject to the fundamental attribution error and don't place blame on others. Though this is a great policy in general, it leaves me either with nowhere to point a finger, or pointing it at myself. Depression turns to the emotion of anger and self loathing. But, since there is no external attribution, all it leads to is confusion. A baseless emotion.

An emotion that cannot be understood, cannot be controlled.

And uncontrolled, unmonitorable, emotion is confusing
And frustrating

And is a weakness.

And I hate that I think that.

Things about you

It's been a long time since I've wrote to you
Or thought about you
Or been one with you.

It's been a long time since I've shared with you
And thought with you
And laughed with you.

It's been a long time since
My world has been thrown into
Such creative confusion

I live in an intellectual whirlwind -
Skipping from gust to gust
And never finding a branch
To hold on to

I don't even know if
I should be
Looking

Everyone's different
Everything's interesting
And
Nothing is easy

I like these people
I like this here

I miss the silence

Update

Ok so college is great - but i'll leave that for another post

In case I haven't told you yet I got a call-back for not a one of the seven a cappella groups I auditioned for on campus - *sigh*

On the other hand though, I'm surprised at the fact that the emotion I have at the moment is not one of anger, but rather sadness. I usually get angry at ignorance, hypocrisy or stupidity or from self-loathing. Since I was pleased by my own performance and all of the groups were unanimous in their rejection of me, there's kind of nothing to be angry about. I'm still in the fine and performing arts res college so I'm still surrounded by talented people. We'll see what becomes of that :)

Cheers,
Shadow's Friend

Leaving tomorrow

So I'm leaving with my dad tomorrow morning - catching a 7:00 flight.

My sister gave me a picture frame to put a picture of the four of us to take with me to college, but that involved having a picture of the four of us. So we were going to take one today (but it was rainy) so fail. We ended up taking like an hour to get a decent shot sitting on our couch at home (20min to figure out the right settings to use - 40 to get everyone to smile).

Say cheese :)

Seeyall,
Shadow's Friend

Update?

I haven't posted much in a while - and I apologize for that.

I had an amazing time working at camp my colleagues, mentors and employers were great. As if there was any way they wouldn't be.

Since then I've been spending a lot of time doing nothing. I've been packing. Everyone's gone :(

Oh! - I got a new camera - panasonic dmc-fz100

So i'll post some pictures if I take nice ones